Two Poems I wrote.

Here are two poems that I wrote about my abuse. Hope this doesn't give anyone triggers. Sometimes when I read them I still get flashbacks but I try to calm myself down.

OUR LITTLE SECRET....

We both walk around as if nothing happened as if you didnt do anything to me. As I look in the eyes of my abuser who I call my stepfather and as he looks at me, his eyes seem to tell me a story. It's our little secret. No one will ever know. No one will believe you. And he smiles. Fear grows inside me and disgust just runs through my veins. I cringe at the sight of him. Why does he have to be like that? Why can't I do anything else to stop him? Those were the questions that ran through my mind after the abuse had occurred. But he doesnt know that I have broken the silence and the vow of that secret. He will no longer have control of me. He can look me in the eye and think that no one knows but hes wrong. Thats my secret. No more silence. 

THE STRANGER  I KNEW.......

The stranger I knew was a family member. Always treated me kind and showed alot of love towards me. But I didnt know that the love he showed would deceive me. He made me feel like a prisoner. He brought me to a dark and dreary place. A place only seen in a nightmare. The way that he touched me paralyzed me and made it difficult to escape. He made me feel like a helpless child without a mother. Hes lips touched mine as if there was some type of magnetic force pulling us together. I wanted to scream for help but I couldnt allow myself to do so. He stayed close to me as if he was protecting me from harm. But he was the one harming me. I allowed everything to go on for weeks because I was trembling from fear. In the end the stranger I knew was my Uncle.